Why are you drinking my root beer?

_A dialogue with a five-year-old._

“Daddy, why are you drinking my root beer?”

“Because I don’t want you to have any.”

“No, that’s not true! Why are you drinking my root beer?”

“Because without root beer, I will die!”

“Ha ha ha! Naw! Why are you drinking my root beer?”

“Because on my planet, there is no water. All the rivers run with root beer to the great Root Beer Sea. It is root beer that we drink.”

“No! You’re a human from Earth! Why are you drinking my root beer?”

“Because I am a tree, and my roots need beer.”

“Ha! Why are you drinking my root beer?”

“Because I want it to dye my hair brown.”

“But your hair is gray!”

“Well, then. I guess it’s not working.”

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