We’ve already learned that there are no sure-fire tricks in baby care — but if there’s one that’s come close so far, it’s swaddling. Wrapping up Lucy snugly to keep her arms and legs comfortably contained simply works wonders. It almost always calms her and puts that look back on her face that says, “Ah, yes, Papa; I can see that once again you are right: there _is_ nothing to worry about.”
As you can see from the photo, my swaddling skills have progressed rapidly. When the nurses at Evanston Hospital saw this particular job, they exclaimed they’d never seen it’s equal. It must be my Boy Scout merit badge in knot-tying that’s coming through, since this certainly is one parenting skill with no application in the wider world. (I must admit I’m particularly proud of the dramatic arrangement of that diagonal stripe, even though it was pure luck. I think it looks like she’s wearing a sash, as if she’s an ambassador or perhaps the newest member of the Honourable Order of Lucia.) You can see how calm and collected she looks here.
But I must admit it isn’t _always_ so. When Baby has something truly pressing on her mind, swaddling doesn’t always still the storm. And in such instances, she has demonstrated an impressive aptitude for escape artistry. If I’ve made some error anywhere — not starting with her arms both completely at her sides, say, or failing to make sure her weight rests on the loose ends of the swaddling cloth — she’s sure to exploit it. Soon enough, there’s first one hand, then the other, wiggling triumphantly from the now-slack wreckage of a once-taut swaddle.
It’s a battle of wits and a battle of wills. And it tells you something that she often beats me. It’s Baby Houdini!
You are lucky that she likes that. Maddy hated it! She would say, “Mom I came out to have more freedom”.
We’ve just had a baby – he’s 3 weeks old. We tried swaddling a few weeks back and it appeared to work, i.e. calm him down and get him to firstly rest and then sleep. Yesterday, he had a new ‘tactic’, of constantly wanting to be on the breast, to simultaneously calm him down and feed for 20 seconds then fall asleep. So, he wanted to feed, to be pacified and fall asleep, all day. I discussed this with my wife since it had gone on all day, and was starting to encroach on our bed time. At 10.45pm when he still couldn’t ‘decide’ whether ‘he wanted’ to feed, sleep or cry, I said ‘Give him here, I’m swaddling him’. Being swaddled, albeit quite poorly, with my wrapping technique, he rested and mildly fought for about 15 minutes. Rachel then asked if I wanted her to take over. I said, give me another 15 minutes, I can’t ‘let him win’. 10 minutes later he put up a right struggle and was yelling and stretching with all his might. I held him tight enough to restrain his movement and then he dropped off instantly to sleep. I was amazed. I’ve written things in inverted commas because everyone talks and writes about these subjects as if the child is making a conscious decision to ‘have their way’ and exercise their freedom. I feel that the biblical principle of training a child in the way they should go has more sway on me in this whole debacle. I also feel that the child’s expression of ‘what they want’ is merely their ‘flesh’, as described from a spiritual point of view. Our flesh is programmed to want our own way, because of sin. This is what we are attempting to train, restrain or reign in, when we swaddle a child. I can only go along with the ‘making them feel comfortable’ argument for so long – after we’ve got all the cosy womb analogies out of the way, which in itself is quite a good restraint, there’s the issue of unrestrained flesh (lasciviousness) that has to be dealt with.
Hi Charles,
Congratulations on your baby! I’m glad that you are finding that swaddling can be comforting for him.
I must say, though, that I disagree with your view of the baby’s needs being related to “their flesh” as Paul describes it. There is certainly a time in a child’s upbringing when it is important for them to receive training and discipline, but that isn’t necessary when they are newborns.
In our view, a very small baby simply desires to have his needs met — for food, sleep, and comfort. Our job as parents is to provide for their needs. We found that swaddling helped to soothe our first daughter to sleep, while our second daughter didn’t really enjoy it at all. It is sometimes a challenge to discern what the baby needs and desires, but meeting these needs in a tiny baby will not spoil them or lead them into sin.
I encourage you to continue to soothe your baby in whatever way he needs! Good luck with the swaddling — I hope it can help bring peace to your family.