Fussy eater

We have good news and bad news. The good news is that Lucy is sleeping well at night, taking terrific naps, and often going four hours between feedings. The bad news is that my body is having a hard time keeping up with Lucy’s demand of big, infrequent feedings.

Fussy eater

Lucy has been settling into this lovely sleeping routine for the past month, so when she started fussing while nursing last week, I wasn’t too worried — she was just having a growth spurt and my body would start producing more milk to satisfy her. Well, we’ve had three nights now with Lucy fussing and hollering at her last feeding of the day, to the point where we gave her a few ounces of previously expressed milk. No big deal, but I *would* be happier if I could actually make all the food she needs these days instead of having to dig around in the freezer with a screaming baby. I know every mother worries about having enough milk, but for a woman of Sicilian descent, it really hurts to not provide my daughter with _abondanza_.

So, what are we to do? Today, I’ve been trying a variety of ways to increase the demand on my breasts: pumping in between feedings, pumping right after nursing, adding a feeding between feedings, etc. The problem with these is that Lucy will get fussy at the next feeding if she isn’t supplied with her usual banquet of milk, which then makes her an inefficient nurser and starts a downward cycle. I think tomorrow we are going to try adding some feedings in the morning and early afternoon and just have normal feedings at night.

I’ve been asking other questions too: Is there something going on that is making my milk production drop? (No, I’m not pregnant again!) Or is Lucy getting ready to eat solids? Or does she not like something in my diet? And why do all of my breastfeeding books have good advice for new moms who are worried about their milk supply, but no advice for mothers of fussy four-month-olds who have gone to six feedings per day? And why can’t I just be a fountain of milk like so many other women, darn it?

I have faith that we’ll get through this rough spot, but it is definitely stressful in the meantime! Lucy and I will just have to stick together and figure it out. Maybe with the help of La Leche League.

10 Replies to “Fussy eater”

  1. it’s probably a growth spurt – Lucy now needs more milk and your body needs to be ‘told’ that – by nursing more often and for longer periods, and/or by trying to pump. That’s normal, even for “fountains” of milk: that’s what makes the fountain work. And it feels like milk production is dropping when the demand increases.

    You’re in a tough spot where you may have to choose between the milk production and the schedule that works for your family. I don’t envy you that. I was never in that boat, always nursing throughout the night for beyond the first year. But are my children any “better” for nursing for that long in exchange for a cranky sleep-deprived mom?

    But hang in there! You and Lucy have done the nursing thing for four months now. Even if you do feel the need to start solids now or do formula rather than driving yourself batty and wrecking your schedule with more feedings and extra pumping – you did it for four months now! Woo hoo!

    When you say ‘inefficient nurser’ what do you mean? Does Lucy give up nursing when she doesn’t get anything, or does it hurt when she nurses, or what? My experience is that nursing hurts when the milk isn’t there, which for me has often been true in the evenings. (Reading a really good book while nursing helps me ignore the pain and not get stressed.)

    The LLL women will probably also ask you if you’re under a lot of stress (being tense can affect milk production) and tell you to make sure you’re drinking enough fluids, eating enough, and sleeping enough. Sleeping seems to solve or lessen a LOT of problems…. the whole nap-when-the-baby-naps thing. :o)

  2. Ann,
    Miriam started solids at 4 1/2 months. I think we didn’t do more than baby rice and later some bananas until 6 months, but maybe it’s time to whip out the Super Baby Food book. I remember going in for her 4 month check-up and asking about solids. The doctor said at this point they’re just getting the hang of using a spoon, and they start out getting as much on their face as in their mouth. But Miriam sure didn’t take more than a couple of days to start mastering the spoon! And you’re mixing the rice cereal with breast milk, so it’s very thin at first. Anyway, I didn’t have much success with the breastfeeding, but I think Lucy is within the range for starting solids and trying it once to see how she reacts can’t hurt.

  3. I started solids with alex and Joseph when they were four months old. I hindsight I wish I would have waited because once you start there is no going back and nursing is so convient. I think that A and J were just too little…..and they were also much fussier toddlers than Charles who started solids around 6 months. He was almost grabbing food from our hands.

    A friend of mine did not start solids until a year because of severe allergies in her family. I do not know how she did that.

    The LLL has some great discussions on thier web site about starting solids. You may want to check tham our for what they are worth.

    Like Kelly I would encourage you to get your rest, eat well….I am also reminded of a dear woman and mom of six who told me at my shower for Alex and Joseph that God would supply all of my needs including milk enough for two babies. She said that she would frequently pray that scripture verse while nursing. I also agree that you shoudl do what works best for your family.

    I will pray for abundance for you today.

  4. Hi Ann – just a couple thoughts for you. We went through a similar phase with Benjamin when he would be extra cranky at night and I thought it was related to milk supply. I can’t remember how old he was, but it was prior to solids so he was probably 4 or 5 months. Anyway – he just gradually got over it. I’m still not certain it was a milk supply issue. I think it’s so easy to jump to that conclusion when breastfeeding because you just have no idea how much they are eating, but in reality it could be a lot of other things as well (teething, a tummy ache, who knows?).

    Anyway, one thing I did do at the suggestion of both my mother and a neighbor who had nursed 3 children was to start offering an extra feeding at night when I went to bed. Benjamin would go to bed around 7pm. I would get him up when I went to bed (around 10 or 10:30) and feed him and then he would usually sleep until 5 or 6 am. At first I was very paranoid about getting him up – obviously he was sleeping so well I didn’t want to mess it up! But really, he barely woke for the feeding – I would pull him out of the crib, he would immediately latch on and when he finished I would lay him back down and he would be sound asleep. By adding this feeding, I believe it helped maintain my milk supply because rather than going 10 or 11 hours without nursing at night, it would only be 7 or 8 hours.

    I do know that once Benjamin went to longer sleep periods at night, he started nursing every 2 hours during the day (since he was basically only up for 12 hours a day, he had to eat every 2 hours to get 6 feedings in), so perhaps you might not want to let her stretch it to 4 hours (unless she’s sleeping, of course). You could also evaluate any dietary changes you may have made recently, although really the only things I can think of off hand that may reduce milk supply are medications such as birth control pills which contain estrogen and sudafed. Although, not consuming enough calories can also cause problems.

  5. Ann, I am in the other boat. I have so much milk I think my nipples are going to pop off. I often want maddy to nurse way before she needs to because I get really in engorged (I go from a almost a to a full c cup) so I have to wear really tight bras to try to get my cow nature to stop or slow down. Ever since the move she thinks she should go to bed at 7pm then nurse around midnight and then again at 5am and 6am. I am so afraid that my chunker will be a round kid that always get made fun of. So I am trying to get her to drink water with meals and not give her the boob unless I am really sure she needs it.
    So I have not gone through what you are going through. But hang in there. If you can go until 6 months before solids it is recommended, but if you can’t than you can’t. Do what works for you….and hay I can send you milk or maybe I can construct a milk pipe line (JK). Hang in there sister!

  6. hi, ann–

    whenever i noticed my milk supply dropping (i pumped from 8 weeks on during the day since i worked full-time outside the home), i would eat a big bowl of thick oatmeal–the slow-cooked kind. that usually worked for me. and being stressed out about how much i was pumping usually prevented me from getting a good let-down. i was better off attaching the pumps and forgetting about it so that i’d be more relaxed.

    i think your supply should catch up with lucy’s demand soon enough. and like nicole w. said, once you start solids, it’s hard to go back–your supply is decreased even more (even if you pump, it’s just not as effective as actual nursing) and lucy will start expecting the solids. unless she’s like cadence, who didn’t really like solids until more like 7 months. also, her digestive system is still maturing, which is why solids are not recommended until 6 months.

    whatever you and jon decide, though, i’m sure lucy will thrive and be just as happy. i’m sure LLL would be a good resource. and they do have galactalogues at whole foods and maybe even at merz.

    the mothering.com website has an active discussion board on breastfeeding as well:
    http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=23
    sometimes it’s a way to get a quick answer from other moms who may have had similar experiences. just don’t get intimidated by the crunchiness (not that there’s anything wrong with being cruncy).

    good luck!

  7. Mo just started his rice cereal two weeks ago. He was ready. He just wanted more and more food. He was very happy to finally get “more.” Sometimes it isn’t your supply, but a desire for food.

    I’d try some mother’s milk tea or fenugreek and if the fussiness keeps up for several more days, consider cereal. Mo did go through a growth spurt this last week, so she may just be trying to enourage more production for her growth.

  8. Hi everyone,

    Thanks for all of your support! So far, so good for today. It is 3:00 pm and we have already had five feedings, and Lucy has been happy for all of them (although we have reached new heights in spit-up production). The challenge is to keep her awake for the pre-nap feedings, but I’d rather have a drowsy baby than a hungry one any day. We’ll see how it goes tonight. Hopefully she’ll be really full from the daytime feedings.

    I talked with Jackie from LLL and she gave a lot of the same suggestions you all did. I’m pleased that increasing the feedings this morning and afternoon has seemed to be helpful. Plus I’m going to try some Mother’s Milk tea (if I can get past the licorice taste — blech!) My goal is to experiment with different solutions for the next week, until our pediatrician appointment on Wednesdsay. If we are still having issues by then, we’ll talk to him about starting solids or supplementing in some way. But there is still a lot of time for problem-solving before then!

    Thanks for all of your comments and prayers. They are really helpful! Plus I have a good idea for a yummy dinner tonight with Jon out of town: Sarah’s oatmeal suggestion!

  9. HI Ann, My milk supply dropped when I had the stomach flu in June. LLL recommended fenugreek and blessed thistle capsules, about 900mg each 3 times a day (available at Whole Foods). That way I could avoid the bitter-tasting tea. I hope things continue to go smoothly!

  10. The funniest part is this: Ann woke up this morning at 6:AM and said to me that she’d had a nightmare: there was a camel in the house and it was hungry, but she didn’t know what to feed it and it kept chasing her. She tried to give it a can of tuna fish.

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