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<\/p>\nNobody likes to barf. And nobody likes it when their kids barf. But why, I’ve been wondering, does the experience fill me with such complete dread and anxiety? I think I’m starting to figure it out — and what to do about it. <\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Lucy suffered through an eight-barf day on Wednesday — poor girl! Her little body went on to battle a fever all day Thursday without the aid of Tylenol (due to her sensitive stomach). She subsisted on Pedialyte ice-pop chips for pretty much the whole day, and finally had a cracker around suppertime. This is probably the sickest she has ever been. We were glad that we could give her a little Tylenol before bedtime — she kept it down, and I think it helped her to sleep peacefully.<\/p>\n
p{color:gray}. Photo: Lucy and I on a more typical day, preparing some special treats together.<\/p>\n
On Friday she was starting to recover, but threw up again in the morning, probably from drinking too much water at once. (Can two ounces be too much? Apparently, yes, and I’ve been berating myself about this for several days.) So we were back to the drawing board: fasting for three hours, then Pedialyte ice-pops, finally graduating to some lemon Jell-O in the afternoon and one Saltine for dinner.<\/p>\n
Lucy is definitely recovering now, but it’s been a challenging few days for all of us. (Throughout all this, Jon had a brutal sore throat and cough.) I noticed that I have an adrenaline rush now every time I hear one of the girls cough or burp — is someone throwing up? I’ve been thinking about why I have so much anxiety around this, and I think I’ve landed on the answer: it is really hard for me to extend comfort and care when I can’t use food as a tool. And it is absolutely excruciating for me to have to refuse someone food. Can you tell I’m Italian?<\/p>\n
Now, I’m not the kind of person who offers a cookie to soothe every skinned knee. But food can be a very powerful thing. Offering a sip of water, some tea, a cracker — these things can help bring relief from scrapes, peace after nightmares, and comfort in routine. And honestly, judicial use of candy can be very effective: a few M&Ms after a vaccination, Skittles after bravely having a splinter out, and of course, jelly beans for using the potty. Plus, for a three-year-old, food is a big part of Lucy’s everyday routine: breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner.<\/p>\n
When I sense the first signs of stomach illness, I get cold all over thinking about the fasting, the rationed ice chips, the constant need to deny requests for normal food and water. The puckering lips and a plea, “But Mama, I’m firsty!” is so hard!<\/p>\n
This time, I ended up tossing our whole routine out the window. Lucy didn’t even come into the kitchen during mealtimes. Truthfully, she was so sick that she was just as happy watching a video on the couch. And I didn’t want to keep explaining why Rosie can have cheese and graham crackers and strawberries while Lucy couldn’t. I spent several mealtimes running down the length of our house, feeding Rosie and myself, then doling out chips of blue-raspberry Pedialyte ice to Lucy. <\/p>\n
Not only is it hard for me to not comfort others with food, but I lose one of my main modes of therapy: baking and cooking. These past few days, I’ve been consciously not preparing much food at all. It is so hard for me to say “no, sweetie, you can’t eat that spaghetti” that I haven’t been cooking anything, just so it is not an issue. But my stress level has been high, and I’ve been fantasizing about the day when our whole family is better and I can cook again. Pasta with garlicky tomato sauce, fresh bread with butter, oatmeal-raspberry crumble bars, arugula salad with shaved parmesan and capers, teriyaki grilled chicken. Mmm….<\/p>\n
I must say, I did learn a few things about comforting without food this time around. Here are a couple of points I came up with:<\/p>\n
* Movies. This is standard fare in the world of sick kids, but I feel that we took it to a new level. Thursday was fever-plus-ice-chips day, and I took that as a blank check for Lucy to watch as many movies as her little heart desired. Here was our line-up (many of which were slept through, on our couch):
\n** “_The Powerpuff Girls_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B00004W1ZX\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_They Might Be Giants: Here Come the 123s_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B000VDDCLK\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_They Might Be Giants: Here Come the ABCs_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B000BEZPSC\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_Wall-E_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B0013FSL3E\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_Chicken Little_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B000DWMYQ8\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_Stuart Little_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B0000640SC\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_The Princess Diaries_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B00006L948\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_Toy Story_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B0009MAO46\/octothorppres-20
\n** “_Wallace and Gromit_”:http:\/\/www.amazon.com\/exec\/obidos\/ASIN\/B000W089WO\/octothorppres-20
\n* Chewing on a washcloth. Those hours of fasting during and after the vomiting episodes are the hardest. A nurse recommended soaking a washcloth in cold water and squeezing it out tightly, then letting Lucy chew on it. It wasn’t that satisfying for her, but better than nothing.
\n* Back scratch. Jon was the person who introduced me to the loveliness of a back-scratch (can you believe it?), so I’ve passed that along to Lucy. I gave her a couple of back scratches and rubs over the days to help her fever-sore body feel a little better.
\n* Fuzzy blankets. I tucked Lucy in with some of my favorite furry throws during her couch-confinement. She also enjoyed resting her feet on a soft pillow, which seemed like a special treat.
\n* Cool washcloth on the forehead. I broke out this standard fever-comfort measure with a fair degree of success. It was hard to keep the cool washcloth from rolling down on the rest of Lucy’s face. But it did seem to help for a time.
\n* Heart necklace. On Friday, I let Lucy wear my special heart necklace Jon had made for me (by our friend “Dora Winchester”:http:\/\/dorawinchester.com\/ before she was born. It says “Ann the Brave” on it, so Lucy and I talked about how she was being very brave through her sickness.<\/p>\n
I think part of the reason food comforts small children so well is that they are very connected to their bodies. Their physical experience of the world is a big deal, so the senses speak loudly to them. There are some other things I could try next time we experience this kind of trial: smelling some peppermint or lemon essential oil, massaging some lotion into the skin, listening to music with headphones. But I hope not to have to think about this again for several months!<\/p>\n
Lucy was the one hit hardest with this bug. Rosie was quite vigorous during Lucy’s sickest days, which made for an interesting contrast in childcare. She and I caught a mild case of it over the weekend (no barfing). Jon escaped the stomach bug, but has been suffering with a terrible sore throat and cold all week. He even got tested for strep, but the results were negative. But even Jon is starting to recover. I’m very grateful that the whole family is on the mend. We even made a new “brownie recipe”:http:\/\/wondertime.coverleaf.com\/wondertime\/200903\/?pg=97 this morning! We got to eat those tonight with our “hooray, everyone’s healthy!” dinner. There is lots to celebrate!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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